August 22, 2008

• Here’s a message I received today that I guess is a response to my most recent post. I’m not going to reveal the writer’s identity because he has taken the pussy route and enabled Xanga Lock, but I did leave all the spelling errors and bad grammar intact—a huge sacrifice as I am the queen of grammar whores.

  Silivia,
  
  your may be a blogger who writes for shock value but advocating the use of diet pills is really, irresponsable. eds are serious probs that shouldn’t be make fun of and your just making it worse by advertising alli. you should be ahsamed for putting many girls health in danger.
  
  

  I was originally going to respond to this message privately, but changed my mind after I remembered that I’m not the type to pass up on an opportunity to publicly humiliate someone. Yes, crapping on someone’s self-esteem is already pretty entertaining—but whatever joy I experience is exponentially increased when shared with others. And when more people feel joy in their lives, the world becomes a happier place. Thus, when you think about it, by deriving amusement at someone else’s expense I’m really doing something good for human kind.
  
  Anyway, the person who wrote this message somehow decided I was pro-diet pills…perhaps because my recent entry included the words “diet pill,” “Alli” and “eating disorder.” Forget the fact that my entire post was dedicated to my terrible reaction skills, and that I used the “Alli” situation to illustrate my ineptitude. Just by using certain terms, I was automatically deemed to be “advocating the use of diet pills.”
  
  First of all, my name is “Sylvia,” not “Silivia,” you stank b*tch.
  
  Secondly, if the ocean was filled with douche, you would be its Poseidon—ruler of Douchelantis.
  
  Third, if I were to consider myself an advocate of anything, it would be literacy; and if you were literate, you would have noticed that I didn’t mention a damn thing about being a proponent—or even an opponent—of diet pills.
  
  But you’re not the type to consider such minor details. The only thing you overly sensitive, self-righteous assholes care about is making society bear the burden of someone else’s responsibilities. When a kid does something violent, you don’t blame his parents for failing to teach him basic moral principles; you instead blame the companies associated with television shows, movies, and video games that depict violence. It doesn’t matter that the kid hasn’t seen any of that stuff; you believe the companies should be held accountable because if it hadn’t been for them, rotten children wouldn’t exist—although that doesn’t explain why a majority of kids manage not to rot despite all this violent media threatening to poison their minds. I wonder if it has something to do with most parents realizing that their children are their responsibility, and not society’s…

  Naturally then, it’s not the individual’s fault they have body issues—it’s my fault because my blog had the words “diet pill,” “Alli,” and “eating disorder.”

  Seriously, instead of fighting battles that aren’t there, why don’t you do something productive like shoving your douche baggery up your butt? And after that, you can learn how to read and write properly…because if anyone should be ashamed–I mean “ahsamed”–it’s you for being a walking turd.

  

  • 4:08 pm
  • 58 Comments